brotherpeacemaker

It's about our community and our spirituality!

White Woman Married To Black Man…

whitewomanblackman

Forget “black communities” and “white communities!” Have you ever even considered the fact that two people might be IN LOVE?! Of course I notice he’s a black man and of couse he notices I’m a white woman. Our backgrounds and upbringings are so incredibly different but that makes the relationship awesomely interesting. Our daughter is going to have the best of both worlds sice we are both incredibly close with one anothers families. Nobody but hippie RACISTS think about “weakening the black and white communities”. . . come on man it’s the year 2009. I’m not stupid, I know there are racists out there but if someone is racist they aren’t going to be in a relationship with someone of a different race just to “weaken” the other race. hahaha I’m sorry I just have to laugh about this because of how obsurd it is that you think that peoples motive when they participate in an interratial relationship is to weaken it or that they even think about that. Every black mans goal is not to bring up “strong black children.” Some men like my husband want to bring up strong, wonderful, smart human beings that are just that. . . HUMAN BEINGS! Get a grip.

Peace,
whitewomanmarriedtoblackmanwithbiracialdaughter

Thanks for the feedback whitewomanmarriedtoblackman,

You may not be stupid.  Although I have begun to develop an impression of you, I really don’t know if you are stupid or not.  But one thing I do know for sure is that you are incredibly naive to think that the black community is not weakened by black people who abandon it so quickly and easily.  I know nothing about your relationship with your black husband and I won’t pretend to know by trying to pigeonhole the two of you into the stereotypical black/white relationship.  I would like to believe that the two of you share equally in a healthy relationship that respects each other’s culture and history.  But all too often, black people who enter into interracial relationships are quick to kick their black community to the curb.

I don’t know for sure if you’re stupid or not, but I will have to question your intellect if you think my supposition is that racist are getting with black people for the sole purpose of weakening the black community.  That doesn’t even make sense to me and I wonder if you’re even bothering to read anything I write or to think about what is written with an unprejudiced perspective.

But one thing I will say is that many, and please note that does not mean all, white people who date people in the black community are enablers who are quick to encourage black people to transcend their race and join the racially generic dominant community that is predominantly white and abandon or minimize any connection or affiliation to the black community.  There was a time where black people who dated white people remained proud of their black heritage.  Now, black people who date exclusively outside the black community could not care any less about the black community.  Any association with the black community is at best superficial.

A lot of children who come from an interracial relationship where one of the parents is obviously black and another parent is obviously white don’t want to be affiliated with the black community.  Being black is perceived as some kind of anathema.  I can only guess that in this obviously mixed relationship, the parents fail to give the child any positive connection to the black community.  The child’s perspective of the black community will be shaped by a society that obviously thinks black people are of lesser value.

I remember not too long ago my woman was having this same type of exchange with a man from the black community and a woman from the white community who swore on their children’s heads that they were a loving interracial couple without a single hang up and were respectful of each other’s racial identity.  They referred to the black man as being brown skinned while the white woman was free to be white.  The man scoffed at the idea of being black because if you looked at him his skin was not black, it was brown.  When asked was the woman’s skin actually white and why they didn’t use a more accurate description for her pigmentation, the couple hemmed and hawed about how it didn’t really matter how they referred to each other.  This was a perfect example of the double racial standard that they were more than happy to live with.  Their alleged mutual respect was nothing more than the black man acquiescing to the dominant community way of life and his black community affiliation was rejected in favor of a more racially generic lifestyle that tends to point the finger at black people for saying anything about the continuing racial animosity in this country.

All too often black people looking for interracial relationships or a relationship with someone other than black are black people who have hang ups about their own blackness.  People who fall in love with people who just so happen to be on opposing sides of the racial divide are not the subject here.  Who am I to stand in the way of true love?

But brothers and sisters whose love for non blacks is inspired by a hatred of self or a hatred of the black community should not be given a pass simply because they find a willing collaborator as an excuse to leave the black community behind.  And you are absolutely correct. There are a lot of black people who have absolutely zero interest in raising children with a strong black affiliation. That happens to be the exact phenomenon which leads to a weaker black community and a strong racially generic community that heavily favors white privilege. I believe most people express the obviousness of something like this as, “DUH!”

Lastly, you find my position absurd.  I’m not surprised and the feeling is mutual.  I find many people from the racially generic dominant community like you absurd as well.  But while you are free to laugh because you believe the impact to you and yours is rather limited, the black community is in trouble.  By every social measure the black community suffers the shitty end of comparison.  Whether it is health care, employment, education, wealth, justice, representation or whatever you wish to use as a measure, the black community always comes up short.  Some of us don’t have the luxury of simply forgetting who comes from the black community and who comes from the white community.

Tuesday, April 28, 2009 - Posted by | African Americans, Black Community, Black Culture, Black Men, Black People, Interracial Relationships, Life, Racism, Thoughts

40 Comments »

  1. You are on point I have nothing else to say.

    Comment by jojo | Wednesday, April 29, 2009 | Reply

    • i love dis pag

      Comment by godslove maxwell | Wednesday, April 3, 2013 | Reply

  2. Well I personally question this ladies intelligence and logic. She seems to have read a bunch of things into the original post that just wasn’t there.

    Such as where did she get the thought that you were saying white people were going out of their way to marry blacks just to weaken the race? How stupid!

    Not to mention she basically makes your point when she says that her black husband and other black men don’t want to raise strong black children. Just like you said, isn’t that weakening the black community?

    And if those black men aren’t raising strong BLACK children then what are they raising? Hmmm, makes me wonder. This is nothing more than a person who wishes to downplay any and all instances of blacks helping to weaken our community.

    Your answer to her was succinct and totally on point. Great job.

    Comment by theblacksentinel | Wednesday, April 29, 2009 | Reply

  3. Yayyyy!

    Comment by Jamel | Wednesday, April 29, 2009 | Reply

  4. Just remember that biracial children that live in America are for all intents and purpose black children-just ask Barack Obama and Tiger Woods. White folks are not deceived into believing these people are at all white. So where does that leave them if we reject their obvious blackness also?
    And besides, I reject the “us vs. them” mentality that seems to pervade through much of your argument. Attack racism wherever it lives, but embrace togetherness wherever you can.
    To focus on these people’s hangups are unfair because we all have them (length of hair, shape of body, color of skin) and what difference does it make if it is a big booty or blue eyes that first catch our physical attention? The human animal is complex; I hold that a black guy who won’t speak to sister that doesn’t have a big butt is just as “depraved” as a guy who won’t speak to a sister, period.
    Finally, I enjoy your musings and most of the time you’re totally on point, but remember, if a contingent of Blacks were brought together to grade how “black” your column is, I’d dare say that most would be critical of your frequent parallels to white penned comic books and sci-fi. It doesn’t bother ME (it’s actually a little refreshing), but does remind me that we all buy into the majority society to some degree in order to move forward at anything quicker than a snail’s pace. If you don’t believe me, show up to work looking like a Kenyan tribesman.
    Besides, to reject whiteness is to reject ourselves to some degree. Rather by hook or crook, 60% (some say more) of us American Blacks have white blood coursing right alongside the black.
    Finally, we will ALWAYS have a black culture because black doesn’t melt well in this pot and we will always need each other. I don’t think that black people are ignoring black culture to their biracial children-just “ghetto” culture something I’m sure you do also if you’re smart. There are lessons to be learned from the ghetto, but they need to be run through the parental filter be the children black, biracial or white as rice.

    Comment by Carlton | Thursday, April 30, 2009 | Reply

    • Thanks for the feedback Carlton,

      I’m not surprised that you minimize this entire issue to an us vs. them perspective. You want to pretend that racism is the exception when all evidence point to it being very much the rule. Most people want to ignore the fact that generally speaking the black community comes up short in every social measure. Most people ignore the fact that unarmed black men are regularly murdered by police officers and black people are regularly depicted as loud mouths, thugs, miscreants, and criminals. We regularly accept the argument that someone black is simply up to no good while someone who is obviously white has a reason for their behavior that we should try to understand and help them if we can.

      Last year, at the peak of the political primary races, a white man strapped himself with duct tape and junk to make it look like he had a bomb strapped to his chest and walked into a Hillary for President storefront. He held the people their hostage and kept the police and authorities at bay for hours. People took the time to reason with him and determine his troubles. He was unemployed and facing financial troubles. The standoff ended peacefully without anybody getting hurt. Time Magazine did an article on that man and how he represents a growing frustration in middle America.

      But sometime prior to that, a black woman calls the police about her black teenage son with a history of mental problems. The son was ranting loudly and the woman wanted help to control him. When the police arrived, the young man held them at bay with a hairbrush. The police shot him dead five minutes after they arrived on the scene. Who has time to spend fooling around with a mentally ill black man?

      We live in a society that regularly promotes discrimination against black people and rewards black people who keep the black community at bay. Tiger Woods doesn’t even consider himself black. He’s some mixture of ethnicities that defies description. The idea that Mr. Woods represents blackness or the best interest of the black community is genuinely ludicrous. The idea that Mr. Woods is a role model for black children and other impressionable black people does not bode well for the black community. Mr. Woods assumes that the black community is not important. His children will grow up learning that the black community is not important. This weakens the black community. Personally, I have never heard Mr. Woods say that he’s not ghetto. However, I have heard him say time and time again that he is not black.

      In his bid for the white house, the only time Mr. Obama allowed himself to visit the black community was when he went to the black church and told black fathers to quit being the epitome of irresponsiblity. Based on what information does Mr. Obama feel that black fathers are more irresponsible than other fathers? There are five times more white children growing up in houses without fathers. Why does the black community need singling out? This is the same Mr. Obama who is more than happy to go to the Jewish community and promises that the United States will protect Israel’s interest without reservation. Why can Mr. Obama make such a pledge to people halfway around the world but refuses to say anything about solidarity to the black community in America’s borders? The fact that a black president can turn his back on the black community weakens the significance of the black community.

      As far as the embrace of racial togetherness goes, I’m all for that when it happens. I have nothing against anybody who is able to reach across the racial divide without hesitation or reservation or limitations. But to think that this is America’s normal operating procedure when dealing with black people is to fool one’s self into thinking that we really do care about our racial divide. And one thing I have learned is that America as a whole is about healing the racial divide as a klan rally is about promoting equal opportunity to blacks.

      The fact that you find my supposition a rejection of white people does not surprise me. In America, to challenge the establishment is to be minimized as little more than someone who rejects white people. Just about anyone who holds up a mirror to America’s face and says look at your racism is considered an enemy of the state. It doesn’t mean that it is any less true.

      I will admit that I have embraced American culture as much as anyone else. How can you live in this country and not adhere to its social policies and its rules for social behavior especially as a black person? But I also refuse to accept America’s orthodox thinking that says black people are inferior, disposable, and less than. Embracing America does not mean I have to embrace racial doublestandards that leave the black community to its fate of being nothing more than a collection of second class people. It would be wonderful if more people accepted such a position on both sides of the racial divide. Simply saying we are equal does not make it so. Especially when every measurement of social wellbeing says that the black community is not being treated fairly. Don’t take my word for it. Just open your eyes and look.

      Peace

      Comment by brotherpeacemaker | Thursday, April 30, 2009 | Reply

  5. BrotherP,

    I love the answer you just gave to Carlton. It summed up everything that people are overlooking in the post. This post in no way is saying that black people who fall in love with a white person is somehow a traitor.

    It is just saying that if and when a black person decided to NOT teach their children to be strong black community members we are suffering. And you can see that by looking at this “ghetto” that Carlton refers to. We wouldn’t have a black ghetto if the successful and middle class blacks didn’t run for the white community at the first opportunity.

    Not only do they run for the white community they tell their children to run as well. We will never be a strong and independent community if we can’t even stick together. You don’t see white people running from other white people. They do run from poor not from white. They don’t tell their children to run to Asian communities etc.

    I just wanted to say that you hit the nail directly on the head with this comment. Thanks.

    Comment by theblacksentinel | Thursday, April 30, 2009 | Reply

  6. I don’t disagree with a thing you said in your reply. I grew up in the projects so I know what pressures are placed on black people firsthand. I grew up as the presumed perpetrator. But I, like most of us, cycled that energy into proving my detractors wrong.
    I wasn’t citing Barack and Tiger as these great examples of biracial perfection. I was saying the opposite: despite their whitewashed examples, the first thing that most white people see when they see them is “blackness”. And with that comes a certain level of rejection. If we want to be better than them, why are we doing the same thing by rejecting what they have to offer (even when they don’t consider themselves black, per se)? We should be embracing all the Baracks and Tigers we can. Black culture needs their dimension, their perspective, their blackness as a part of our rich spectrum. Any condemnation of what two people who build their lives together decide to do only enriches us. The Huxtables are just as relevant as the Evanses (from Good Times) or the Muslims down the street or the americanized Afrikaners. It’s all black. It’s all valid. I took my history and culture to college, to work and to past relationships I have had with women and friends of all colors. If we want whites to be more inclusive and accepting, we’ve got to be the shining example and not laugh TOO hard every time we see Michael Steele in action…he’s black too.

    Comment by Carlton | Thursday, April 30, 2009 | Reply

    • Carlton,

      What you’re proposing sounds like the Doctor Smith Syndrome. Dr. Smith, played by Jonthan Harris in the series and later redone on the silver screen by Gary Oldman, was the nemesis of the Robinson family in Lost in Space. Despite everything the Robinson family did for him, Dr. Smith wouldn’t hesitate to screw them over if he could get a personal benefit out of it. By the same token, despite the fact that Dr. Smith would regularly bite the hand that fed him, the Robinson family would take Dr. Smith with them wherever they went. If Major West had his way Dr. Smith would’ve found himself floating to the next planet on the other side of the airlock.

      But every week, with resources stretched to the limit and danger lurking on every planet they encounter, the Robinson family made enough room on the Jupiter 2 to take Dr. Smith along to the next thrilling episode. It never occurred to anybody that Dr. Smith could simply disappear or have an accident in the chariot. If I was on the Jupiter 2, Dr. Smith would’ve had a fatal accident before the first commercial break. Hey Peacemaker, are those your fingerprints on that durlotronium pipe sticking out the back of Dr. Smith’s head?

      Just because someone is black does not make them a benefit to the black community. I don’t have a problem of cutting black people off who would rather see the black community exist only in a history book. If Tiger Woods was hit by a truck tonight, the impact (no pun intended) to the black community would be minimal. The same holds true for Michael Steele and other black Republicans like Clarence Thomas. The same holds true for many black celebrities who use their notoriety to buck and dance jigs for the racially generic culture that is predominantly controlled by white people. Trust me, the black community would do better if all the jigging stopped and black celebrities like Snoop Dogg and D.L. Hughley and Jason Whitlock crawled back under a rock somewhere.

      The idea of rejecting black people who reject the black community is one that I personally feel more black people need to embrace. Instead, we want to become black community enablers quick to turn the other cheek in order to prove how much better we are. The black community will go straight to hell with that kind of thinking.

      If somebody is a thief that is stealing you blind, if somebody is a pedophile waiting to stalk your children, if someone is a murderer waiting for you to go to sleep, what’s the point of keeping such people around? The same goes for the black community. If a black person wants to turn their back on the black community, supports the racial status quo or reinforces all the negative stereotypes against black people, what is the point of keeping these people as part of our black culture? Why does the black community need the added dimension, the perspective, the blackness of black people who want to be anything but black?

      The way I see it, our rich spectrum is poorer for the continued contribution of some high profile blacks to the condition of total assimilation to the racial status quo. The black community needs these people like we need fly pimps and crack addicts.

      Some black people find these black turncoats attractive simply because they are admired by the majority of people in the dominant community. The dominant community embraces them because they reinforce the idea that black people can make it in America if they just work hard or have a talent that people in the white community want to pay to see. The black community is programmed to buy into the idea of black people working hard to overcome racial disparity. And if Oprah can do it, by golly any black person can do it.

      But the truth of the matter is that for every Oprah or Tiger or Barack, there are millions of black people who exist at the opposite end of the spectrum proving that racial disparity is alive and well and most efficient in assuring that the black community keeps its second class status. And because the black community refuses to point to these people and admonish their duplicity, because we refuse to speak with a single voice to reject those who reject us, many black people are duped into thinking black people who reject the black community are somehow necessary to enrich the black spectrum of experience.

      The very idea that the black community benefits by harboring black people who would rather be recognized as a unique ethnic mixture instead of being seen as black people is a concept that escapes my definition of sensible. It might be all black. But it is far from prudent and far from being a benefit to the black community. It only weakens the black community to think that we need to include black people who refuse to be black.

      Peace

      Comment by brotherpeacemaker | Thursday, April 30, 2009 | Reply

      • I know we’ll never convince each other so this will probably be my last post on this. But here goes: I don’t know if you believe me, but I’ve actually made a lot of your points on other forums full of conservatives who love to point to the few famous blacks who came from “less than” and love to pull out that tired “by your bootstraps” phrase like anyone from my neighborhood has boots, or if they do-ones that fit properly much less with straps on them? Not only that, why is it that people of other races assume that most black people are even LOOKING to be a CEO of a Fortune 500 company or one of the other jobs they tout as the tantamount of this thing called success?
        But I must insist-once we as black people start putting blackness in a box-labeling what is and isn’t black-that is the day we limit who and what we are as a people…and ultimately how far we can go. No matter what we do, even surround ourselves with the whitest of all things white, believe me it won’t dilute your “blackness”. If you don’t believe me, put on some Lacoste, wax up the Volvo, strap Buffy into the passenger seat beside you, and try to get into a gated community in Bel Air. You’ll be reminded real quick just how black you are despite your milque-toast trappings.

        Comment by Carlton | Thursday, April 30, 2009

      • Carlton,

        “If you don’t believe me, put on some Lacoste, wax up the Volvo, strap Buffy into the passenger seat beside you, and try to get into a gated community in Bel Air. You’ll be reminded real quick just how black you are despite your milque-toast trappings.”

        I see your point. I bet that happens to Tiger Woods, Will Smith, Halle Berry, and Oprah Winfrey all the time. And yet they still live a disconnected life from the vast majority of black people. Go figure.

        Peace

        Comment by brotherpeacemaker | Thursday, April 30, 2009

  7. I was talking about you and me-not people that have become household faces. But if you want to throw out every person with blackness that has transcended that “blackness” (usually through no fault of their own except their ambition for more) I can see your point too. It’s the same point we make to our children when we diss ANY person of dark complexion, to include Clarence Thomas and Amos N’ Andy: don’t be TOO sucessful at anything, (especially at garnering the respect or attention of some white folks) or we’ll kick YOU out of the race too. And then we wonder why our children are happier with “less than” or call each other “white” or names like “Pointdexter” when someone in the neighborhood “studies too much” or tries too hard to get along with everyone they come into contact with.
    This kind of behavior leads me to believe that a percentage of the more successful of us that leave the old neighborhood aren’t abandoning it-they’re being chased from it. That attitude really disappoints me…like crabs in a barrel, man…crabs in a barrel.

    Comment by Carlton | Friday, May 1, 2009 | Reply

  8. One other thing…all those people you mentioned? They do get reminded they’re black in the way I talked about. Oprah was kicked out of a small Georgia town for being black and assuming she could “love” her way into their hearts. Tiger on the day he was celebrated as “the first black hope” in golf had collard green and chicken jokes told about him. Halle Berry-you always hear how cute she is for a black girl. Will Smith? Well they leave him to the black community to tear down. I grew up with his music played LOUD on the block and thought he was funny and witty. All my friends have dropped him though and make jokes now that that new “Black positive” genre gangsta rap is back and doing so much for the uplifting of the race. And no I’ve got nothing against those brothas either-they’ve got their thing to do. And who can forget all the problems Michael Jackson had just for having white kids in his house, but Pete Townsend was caught using his credit card to access a child porn site and got away scot free. But do what you think is best my brotha, I just hope that when you’re through, there’s some black people left in your box.
    Peace and..Out.

    Comment by Carlton | Saturday, May 2, 2009 | Reply

    • Carlton,

      Oprah Winfrey got kicked out of a town in Georgia for being black? When did this happen? I have got to read more about this! And just because Fuzzy Zoeller made a joke about Tiger Woods having fried chicken and greens on the menu at the Masters Tournament dinner does not mean that Tiger Woods suffers from the black condition. And poor Halle Berry! She’s only pretty for a black girl. Who says this? Don’t tell me, let me guess. It was all those people who kicked Oprah Winfrey out of their small town. Dude, you stretch farther than a pair of fruit of the looms on Rush Limbaugh’s ass after a heavy meal.

      I didn’t realize you thought I needed any reminders that I come from the black community. Did you really think I thought I would be completely welcomed in posh white communities without suspicion? I get blamed when a soda can explodes in the freezer at work when I just happen to be the only black person in the office and you think I needed some kind of reminder that I come from the black community? I’m sorry, but you really must not read this blog as often as you say.

      And why do black people insist that black people don’t care for successful black people? You really do make a lot of assumptions.

      Success is not an automatic exclusion for black people. But when black people obtain success at the expense of the black community, or black people who obtain success by helping to reinforce the status quo that keeps black people in a second class status, or black people who obtain success by jigging for white people and reinforcing every stereotype of black people, then we have a problem. It is rather small minded of some black people who claim black people cannot be financially successful and remain in the black community. Success worked for people like Michael Eric Dyson, Dick Gregory, Henry Louis Gates, Bell Hooks, Octavia Butler, and Wyclef Jean. These are black people who manage to become successful and maintain a connection to their black community that doesn’t require them to put other black people down or adhere to any racial stereotypes or racial status quos. It’s just a little more figuring for you to go figure.

      There may be some truth in your assumption that this blog doesn’t appeal to the majority of black people in America. Way too many black people think that success requires the previously mentioned jiggy dancing and the buck wild behavior the dominant community requires of black people. Way too many black people are more concerned with personal gain and personal appearance than the condition of the black community. Way too many blacks are more than happy to kick the black community to the curb in order to gain some semblance of success.

      Truth be told, I really don’t care if the vast majority of people from the black community don’t care to read this blog. The purpose of my blog is not to stroke the black community’s ego or simply build up a large following at the expense of what I see and feel as the truth. I would think that people with integrity would eschew popularity at the expense of the truth. I beg your pardon but the very idea that you think that I am trying to pull black numbers for the sake of black number is another simplistic assumption on your part.

      My blog is intended as nothing more than an expression of what I think and what I observe. The last thing I want is to become another popular distraction for black people by talking up fashion or music or sports. My blog is intended to get people to think about what has happened, what is happening, and what is going to happen to the black community. Thinking and caring has become old fashioned in today’s narcissistic culture. The thinking and caring that signifies compassion for the black community is not only dead but is an invitation to be dismissed as nothing to be taken seriously.

      My blog is not intended to have mass appeal to everyone in the black community. In fact, the target audience for my blog isn’t even the people in the black community. My blog is intended for those people, regardless of race, creed, or color, who care about what is happening in the black community. I’m happy to say that there are quite a few black people who enjoy this blog on a regular basis. But then again, I’m happy to say that there are white people who enjoy this blog just as much as any black person could. I’m even happier to say that there are people who come to this blog and I have no clue what their race may be. It’s not important. What is important is that I have something to say and people who are willing to listen to me.

      You claim you read my blog on a regular basis. But if that was true, if you truly knew anything about this blog, you would understand where I was coming from. Or maybe you were just coming for the entertainment value. I can understand that, although being somebody’s entertainment was never my intention. It’s just one of those things that happened on its own.

      And thank you so much for the suggestion that I should do what I think is best with what I have to say. But I have to admit that I wouldn’t have it any other way.

      Peace

      Comment by brotherpeacemaker | Saturday, May 2, 2009 | Reply

  9. I agree with this woman. You need to get a grip. I have so many friends who would roll over laughing at you. Most of them black men. Yes, I’m pointing you out because you are black. Yes, you were blamed for the soda can because you are black. Because EVERYTHING is about “blackness”. *eyeroll My friends make jokes about guys with your mentality all of the time. “Dude, you’re out of toilet paper.” “It’s because I’m black, isn’t it?”

    One last thing..The Creator said, “Thou shalt have no other gods before Me.” He didn’t say, “Thous shalt have no other gods before Me EXCEPT YOUR RACE.” Race-worshiper. Idolater.

    You may copy and paste this to your buddies at Storm Front, they have the same mind set. Just exchange color designations where necessary.

    Comment by Michelle | Wednesday, May 27, 2009 | Reply

    • My black friends say your black friends are punks, and that only dogs ‘roll over’.
      Thanks

      Comment by SoToAll | Thursday, December 31, 2009 | Reply

  10. Thanks for the feedback Michelle,

    “I have so many friends who would roll over laughing at you.”

    Oh, I’m so hurt! Your opinion and that of your friends means so much to me! I’ve never had to deal with people disagreeing with me before. How will I get through this? I’m just going to have to copy and paste to any black buddies I can find over at Storm Front who date white women. I’m sure that will make me feel better. KILL F**KING WHITE PEOPLE!!! I’m feeling better already.

    Since you’re obviously void of reasoning I guess I should point it out to you and your jovial buddies that I’m not serious about killing white people, even white people of limited intellect like you. And as far as people hanging out at Stormfront, they’re more your type, rather thick in the head and quick to come down on black people who might see things differently from them. I bet you didn’t even read the entire article. Please understand comments from people like you aren’t welcomed here.

    Peace

    Comment by brotherpeacemaker | Wednesday, May 27, 2009 | Reply

  11. OMG! I am rolling my freaking eyes as well. Where in the post did Brotherpeacemaker say that he thought “blackness” was everything or that black was better than any other race.

    Because when someone compares a person to people at stormfront then they are obviously saying that the person thinks that they’re race is best and all others are inferior. So basically Michelle is comparing a racist to a person pointing out race problems. HMMM! Is that a bit like comparing a rapist to a man who has consensual sexual relations with his wife. Pretty pathetic.

    But of course I find that a LOT of white people find humor in people pointing out racism and the problems related to it. You know me and my friends laugh at people like Michelle all the time. You know the type. The know it all white person who knows problems in the black community better than any black person would.

    Michelle isn’t it time for you and the rest of your friends to pile back into that little car? The ringmaster already closed up the tent. Good bye!

    Thanks.

    Comment by theblacksentinel | Wednesday, May 27, 2009 | Reply

  12. I find this a bit… contradictory? Isn’t the whole concept of “equal opportunity” to be indiscriminant? I guess that’s just MY opinion.

    Personally, I was raised in a very typical “white” community. My grandparents are still the elitist germans from WWII. But my personal philosophy on life is I try to judge everything on a case-to-case basis. I apply that to as much of my life as possible, but especially my friendships/relationships. I’ve dated people of almost every nationality. The man that I’m in a relationship right now moved here from Liberia as a child. Because I got to know him as a person first, our nationalities don’t have much of an issue. One thing I can say is that communication was a little difficult at first. Not only considering the accents, but because we both were used to conversing in different ways.

    The general point is, even though he is dating me, he hasn’t left his community. To the contrary, we’ve both made a significant effort to get to know each other’s family and come to a common ground and eventually bond with them. Our friend group that we hang out with consists of people of multiple races. So he has, most definately, not left the “black community.”

    Comment by Liduen | Thursday, August 13, 2009 | Reply

  13. Thanks for the feedback Liduen,

    “People who fall in love with people who just so happen to be on opposing sides of the racial divide are not the subject here. Who am I to stand in the way of true love?”

    This is an excerpt from the post that I wrote. All too often, I wish the people who come here and make comments would actually read and take a moment to comprehend what I wrote. Typically, many people simply make comments and assumptions about the subject. All too often those comments are indiscriminate, unrestrained, and wanton.

    Peace

    Comment by brotherpeacemaker | Thursday, August 13, 2009 | Reply

  14. What I get from this is that there are folks who decide they will not date within their own race and that is an issue (I agree) and that is different than just loving who you happen to love.

    I’ve known several Black men who have chosen not to date Black women because (insert Black woman stereotype here) and that does weaken the community. And that is my issue, I guess. How does one decide that women like the one who was good enough to give him life, are less desirable and lovable than some other kind of woman?

    I want to add that I absolutely love it when a White person speaks on behalf of all their ‘Black friends’. **eye roll**

    Comment by c | Friday, December 11, 2009 | Reply

    • Even though I, a ‘white’ woman (my actual color is more of a beige) date ‘black men’, well any men I don’t care…”black, white, puerto rican, chineese boys” (missy eliote), I understand the article. I know this sounds really strange, but I will ask the men who ask me out if they ever dated outside their race before. If the anwser is yes, then I ask if they ever dated their race before. If the anwser is no, or somehting along the lines of “if it ain’t white, it ain’t right” I refuse to exchange numbers. Why? Because it is onething to like me based on me, it is another to like me becasue I am white. Also, if they don’t date their own race, they have issues I would not even want to deal with.
      Peace to you as well

      Comment by Well... | Thursday, December 31, 2009 | Reply

    • Thanks for the feedback Well,

      But it doesn’t sound strange at all. Black people who don’t date their race cannot possibly claim to be role models for the black community’s future. It isn’t about black people who date white people. Truth be told I’ve dated a few white women in my past. I seriously doubt if they would say that I was trying to abandon the black community. And if a white woman said she only dates black men I’d have to say she might have some issues. No one is saying black people shouldn’t date white people. But what’s the motivation?

      Peace

      Comment by brotherpeacemaker | Thursday, December 31, 2009 | Reply

  15. are you people serious? you SAY you don’t mean all black people abandon their heritage by dating white women, but how much you go on and on and on about it, and how detailed you get over your thoughts on what THEY are thinking proves you believe MOST if not almost ALL blacks do this by dating whites. I am dating a black man, and how about this….we are both from NYC, and found ourselves stuck here in redneck hell. it’s a white, cookie-cutter world up here. My poor man just had no damn choice but to chose a white woman. I mean, good thing we turn him on anyway, but still, he wouldn’t have a choice if he wanted one!

    Can anyone realize that it is not always about race? What if skin color was just on the list of things you actually LIKE about a person?! I have dated mostly all white men, and have come to find now that I have a strong attraction to black skinned men. So what? If you are Italian and really get turned on by red hair, does that make you wanna-be-Irish, or does it mean you are abandoning your Italian heritage? I hate this crap that seems to only be applied to black/white, and NO OTHER racial divide. It makes me sick. If you are German and love Jews, does that mean you are betraying your ancestors? Is it the high contrast between our looks that get to people?

    I mean please, get used to the fact that some people may actually be attracted to each other, and betraying their race or abandoning their love for their ancestors is not even a THOUGHT in their mind!! Many different people have had to get over differences even harder than black and white. For God’s sake my 100% German grandfather had to go kill Germans in WWII. Does this mean he hates his ancestors? He could have been killing his cousins! Sometimes we change as people. We don’t forget our heritage, but when ideals change, we must learn to DEAL WITH IT. I don’t give a crap what any white OR black, man OR woman, thinks when my black man and my white little self go anywhere. If they don’t like it fine. Go run your mouth and help broaden the color gap to make it a little wider for the next generation to jump over.

    Sometimes it seems people having anger issues towards their own race for interracial relationships make easy the most strong and ridiculous sure fire way to push for stronger racism. The hate turned from us not understanding each other and violence against one another, into now we want to understand each other and want to live together, but your fellow man doesn’t want you dissing your own people. If you are that into segregation then hop in a time machine and travel back 80 years. Then maybe we will stay away from each other. Till then, MOST of us in interracial relationships have NO plans to diminish the importance of our significant other’s background. In fact, I would hope and want to make sure that if I marry a black man and have a biracial child, I would want to make sure my child knew and understood every aspect of his heritage, and every corner of the world his people are from, whether it be British, German, Kenyan or Tanzanian. Guess that just makes him American, eh?

    We can all be sexy, we can all be ugly. We can all choose who we want. I have gone 27 years of my life having all white and failing relationships. So when this sexy, sweet guy comes along, and he also happens to have different skin pigmentation than I, why should I pass him up? Because someone feels I am abandoning my British-English-German mutt of a background? Some of us just don’t care as much as you think we all do. And not everyone in an interracial relationship even puts that much thought into it. And it’s a shame to think that him and I could be walking anywhere, and anyone, black or white, could be looking at us thinking that we have turned our backs on our own cultures. How DARE ANYONE make an assumption about me without even knowing me. For every one of us trying to disprove reasons for racism, or try to knock down boundaries, there are 10 other people with boards and hammers putting the walls back up, and in the process, getting the younger kids to hold the nails. I just want to have my man and not be bothered. Who cares whether the flavor that seems long lasting to me be vanilla or chocolate?

    Comment by Jen | Saturday, December 26, 2009 | Reply

    • Thanks for the feedback Jen,

      But the more important question is…are you serious? You really don’t think I have a clue about you and your beloved beau? Obviously I must have struck a nerve and hit a little too close to your interracial relationship. One thing I will agree with you is that I really do believe that most black people who make the choice to date people other than their own race are doing so because of race. Just look at your choice of words…

      “My poor man just had no damn choice but to chose a white woman. I mean, good thing we turn him on anyway, but still, he wouldn’t have a choice if he wanted one!”

      But you will say that I’m the one that’s making this all about race. Why do you claim your black man is turned on by white women? Why is he living in redneck hell? Do you two have plans to go live in a black neighborhood somewhere? Or will you maintain your lives in your predominantly white area?

      You asked if an attraction to red hair means someone wants to be Irish. This really is a pitiful comparison to the issue at hand. Right now, I don’t know of any effort in America to subjugate the Irish community. These days, most Irish people are accepted as welcome members in most white communities. I know of no movement by Irish people to get away from their Irish heritage. Most Irish people are not identifiable as Irish by sight like most black people are identifiable as black by site. Irish people don’t deal with racial slurs that have the same impact as racial slurs for the black community. So what is your point? Is there much of a racial divide between the Irish community and the rest of the white community? So why are you trying to compare this to the racial divide between whites and the black community? Who ever heard of the Irish race? I think it is the Irish culture you’re trying to make a comparison with to the black race and it falls woefully short.

      Why don’t you get accustomed to the fact that there is racism in America against the black community? Why don’t you try to open your mind and listen and try to learn something instead of just bitching about things that you really don’t or even want to understand. Your man obviously isn’t trying to educate you about the racism that continues to plague the black community. You two are happy to start your life together in your little Pennsylvania town that you refer to as redneck hell. How is he helping the black community? What issues do you two discuss about the black community? How often do you two patronize the black community when you go out on your dates or when you decide to partake a night on the town? What black establishments do you patronize? When was the last time the two of you even visited a black community? These questions are rhetorical. I’m sure we both know the answers. Prior to you making this issue so personal to your situation, no one said jack about you and your significant other. But since you want to make this about you then let’s take a moment to examine your interaction with the black community.

      “I mean please, get used to the fact that some people may actually be attracted to each other, and betraying their race or abandoning their love for their ancestors is not even a THOUGHT in their mind!”

      Believe it or not, this is the problem. Nothing your black boyfriend is doing is done with the slightest consideration of how it might impact the black community. And you claim that people had to get over differences more polarizing than issues of black and white. What would those be? You say your German grandfather was killing other Germans? You make me laugh with your simple ideas. Americans kill other Americans all the time so I guess this means that they’re un-American in your simple mind. Was your grandfather a criminal or something? What context are you referring to? Did your grandpa make a choice to help stop Germany’s infamous atrocities during the second world war? If so, how does this relate to you and your black boyfriend? Is it your contention that your black boyfriend wants to kill black people? When do you two talk about the issues impacting the black community, or better yet, do something about them? Don’t tell me, let me guess. You don’t give a crap about any white or black issues. But coming from the white community that is more likely to subjugate the black community, you have the luxury of putting such thoughts aside and not worrying about the impact to your community because you are comfortable with the understanding that your community will continue with absolutely no impact.

      On the other hand, your boyfriend should realize that he has left his black community behind. You’ll deny it. You’ll say it was just you two falling in love and being too busy to think of anything else. But he made the choice to leave his black community and go someplace where the chances of him meeting a compatible black woman was virtually nil compared to his chances of meeting a Marcia Brady wannabe. And if it wasn’t you, he’d find himself a nice little Mary Ann or a Ginger or, if he’s into cougars, a Mrs. Howell. He made the choice to put himself in an environment where he cut himself off from any involvement with other black people. You said so yourself, he has no choice but to date white women. You say you want your future biracial children to learn their culture whether it’s from Kenya or Tanzania. But what are you doing to experience your boyfriend’s black community today, here and now? I’d be willing to bet nothing. Am I wrong? I seriously doubt it.

      “We can all choose who we want. I have gone 27 years of my life having all white and failing relationships. So when this sexy, sweet guy comes along, and he also happens to have different skin pigmentation than I, why should I pass him up? Because someone feels I am abandoning my British-English-German mutt of a background? Some of us just don’t care as much as you think we all do.”

      Again, something else we agree on. I know for a fact that neither you nor your boyfriend cares enough to make a difference for the black community. If your boyfriend hasn’t turned his back on his community then I have no clue what to call it. How dare anyone make an assumption about you without even knowing you? Woman, up until a little while ago I never knew that you even existed. I have never cared one way or another about you or your relationship. What I cared about was the black community. The black community is something you will never know anything about. It’s not in Kenya or Tanzania? Give me a fucking break. The black community isn’t across the ocean. You’d know that if you cared. You would know that if your boyfriend cared.

      Thank you for being such a fine example of one of the many multitude of problems that continues to plague the black community.

      Peace

      Comment by brotherpeacemaker | Saturday, December 26, 2009 | Reply

      • Lol, you are very witty and I love it!!!

        For some reason, Jen feels attacked, mostly because she missed the point of the article, that’s all. I think maybe you should try re-explaining again, only with blacks who leave the community…wait, you mentioned that…well maybe if you explain its not the racial aspect but the abandoning of the black community, then all these mixed couples wouldn’t assume its about them…oh wait… its always about them…never mind. And by them I do not mean mixed couples, I mean people like jen who are ALWAYS the victim.

        That’s right, I am white and I date whoever, and I think everyone is over reacting. The man is just saying the black community needs the support of blacks, and you know its true which is why you want to argue about racism instead of the last time you visited a black owned anything. Guess I am sellout to the white community, its ok I didn’t want to die my hair blond and fake tan anyway.

        peace to you too

        Comment by Well... | Thursday, December 31, 2009

      • Well!!! It looks like somebody gets it!

        Peace

        Comment by brotherpeacemaker | Thursday, December 31, 2009

  16. Jen,

    You said, “My poor man just had no damn choice but to chose a white woman.” Um, bullshit! I lived in the cradle of whiteville myself and still was able to find a black man. Because that is what I wanted. Your man obviously wanted a white girlfriend and location isn’t an excuse. Unless he was on the moon.

    People have choices in this world. And he selected a white woman which was his right to do. Which isn’t the issue. But when you say things were the furthest from his mind in regards to thinking of the black community, you make the point of the entire post. It isn’t about whether or not love between black and white is right or wrong. It is about whether or not black people are taking an initiative to strengthen the black community.

    And trust me, if you are planning to have biracial children then it would behoove you (and your children) to learn about the community that half their DNA came from BEFORE they get here. Then you will understand more of who they will and can be. And for goodness sake, unless you are in a relationship with a Kenyan or Nigerian or Tanzanian man, then your children will more than likely be a part of whatever black community your man was born into.

    Thanks.

    Comment by theblacksentinel | Saturday, December 26, 2009 | Reply

  17. [Comment deleted because of a severe lack of tact]

    Comment by Jen | Sunday, December 27, 2009 | Reply

    • Jen,

      You claim that I would look at your boyfriend and wonder wtf he was doing with you. When I could care less. I would however look at him and wonder why he chose to waste so much time on such an idiot. Since I personally find idiocy such as yours far worse than any type of interracial love. And as far as I can see, YOU are the one who did not read your own reply.

      You keep saying that someone is talking about YOU. How narcissistic of you. Where in the original post did you see your name? Because as I read it, a long fucking time ago, I never saw any name such as Jen pop up. So get a freaking clue, loser. It’s a shame that anyone black or white would waste two seconds of time trying to date anyone as confused and self centered as you.

      You also claim that you weren’t a hundred percent serious when you said that he didn’t have a choice not to date a white woman then in the next sentence say that he had the choice NOT to date or date a white woman. Um, huh? Do you even bother to pay attention to anything you write? This is the typical writing of a confused, uneducated individual who lacks even a modicum of common sense. And trust me YOU ARE not dumbing down the black race, but the entire human race.

      Get a clue, you goofy jackass.

      Comment by theblacksentinel | Sunday, December 27, 2009 | Reply

      • I do not know what she said, but she pissed you off and your reply has me laughing so hard I am crying. You told her off in a very mom way, I have a lot of affection for you now. When I cuss and tell people off it makes me look ignorant, when you tell people off and cuss at them, they look ignorant, and that’s awesome. I hope to learn this skill from you, ;)

        Thanks for suggesting this site, have a safe and happy new year with your family.

        Shalom

        Comment by SoToAll | Thursday, December 31, 2009

  18. Jen,

    Look you racist example of trailer park trash! Just because you got your comment posted the first fucking time doesn’t mean you’re welcome to spout your tripe here. Go get a fucking clue. You’re too stupid to realize the only reason your shit gets posted is because I allow it to be posted. I wouldn’t let you come into my house and start trashing the place. I’ll be damned if I let you come to my blog and disrespect me with your tired shit. If you got something to say about my blog then I suggest you find someone who’s willing to listen to your tired ass and tell them. Your boyfriend might be interested. I’m sure he appreciates your reference to his black family celebrating Kwanzaa based on nothing but the fact that he’s black.

    But then you will swear up and down and try to convince people that you respect black culture. Fuck you and whatever passes for culture in your little world. You asked what do I want from you? I’d appreciate it if you could step off the face of the fucking earth and give the ozone layer a break from all the hot air you spew. There are way too many people here like you. The last thing I need to do is to waste my time dealing with one more. I find you a simplistic and narcissistic. And it’s only a matter of time before your black boyfriend wakes up and realizes all those white guys who dated you in your past were right about you. From what I can tell, your shit is too whacked for any man to deal with regardless of color. It’s only a matter of time before he kicks your dumb-ass to the curb as well.

    And lastly, your comment about me reading what you write letter by letter. What sense would it make for anyone to read your long diatribes letter by letter? I realize you’re trying to insult my intelligence and imply that I need to break your comment down to its most simple components in order to understand. But reading it letter by letter would make about as much sense as reading an eye chart in an optometrist office. Then again, an eye chart would be more consistent than your flip flopping tripe. In your deleted comment you claim that you weren’t serious when you said your black man didn’t have a choice but to date white woman. But then in your next sentence you wrote that if he wanted to date he had to date white women.

    Like I said, nothing but flip flopping tripe.

    Peace

    Comment by brotherpeacemaker | Sunday, December 27, 2009 | Reply

  19. By fact the Black Community is always seen as the most down graded but of all the reasons why ? Its the type of Evil that exist in each Community & the way it is handled. Notice in a White Community when white men do criminal activity, many times We hear oh he was caught, locked up for a few days & now doing a little community service, why ? Most times a white man rather do the service than die or go to Prison. Not saying this is all cases in the white community. Now in many Black Communities when Black Men do crime, what’s that popular story ? The Police raided some place in the Black Community & were greeted by a rage of gunfire, a shoot out took place, this amount were shot & killed while whoever was found suffering from gunshot wounds. Further investigations led the Police to say these men were believed to be members from some Rival Gangs in their own Community. See the difference ? Most times when black criminals are caught by police or whoever,.. it turns out to be a do and die situation, because most Black Criminals say rather than to be caught like the white criminals & do community service will say I’d Die before I go to jail or be caught by police. So its a BIG difference where a White Criminal takes a seconds chance at being better but the Black Criminal says I’d rather die before that. So right there Black Men don’t look as smart as the white Men, just by that foolish thinking. Also notice alot of times when crimes happen in White communities the World does’nt dwell on that story too long or in some cases We don’t even hear about it at all. But if the Criminal was Black We shall hear about it until THY KINGDOM come. I agree all Blacks should know Black History but DO NOT LET IT MAKE YOU EVIL BY NO MEANS. I say that because in all Races there are always some persons Who encourage HATRED against another race. When I hear of a crime the only thing that puzzles Me is what the hell drove that person to do such a thing ? Personally the only people Who bring shame on Earth are those who hate either their own race, those who hate another race, & those who just hate you no matter what race. 2009 its time way overdue that We start truly LOVING everyone no matter what color.

    Comment by Lover of All Races | Thursday, December 31, 2009 | Reply

  20. Thanks for the feedback Lover of All Races,

    Again with the racism against black people. The only time crime happens in the black community is when it involves black gangs. And black people don’t talk to the police. That’s just more of this blatant bull. What gang did Oscar Grant belong to when he was face down on the ground with his hands in handcuffs behind his back when the cop popped a cap in his back? What gang did Martin Anderson belong to when he was choked into submission and died as a result of his injuries within a couple of hours after arriving at a boot camp for taking his grandmother’s car for a joyride? What gang did the Jena 6 belong to when the Louisiana prosecutor decided to convict all the black kids for fighting with white kids but the white kids walked away with no charges? But you’ll sit here and claim that the difference is that police say that its rival gangs. You’ll say that black criminals would rather die before they go to jail. Based on what? No doubt something you pulled out your ass and expect to ram down our throats. You really should change your name to Lover of all races but too prejudice against black people to see racism.

    Peace

    Comment by brotherpeacemaker | Thursday, December 31, 2009 | Reply

  21. I realize this post is about a year after everyone else, but bear with me, it’s relevant…

    Almost everyone posting here, including the original post (yes, I read it) is treating relationships as if they WERE based on stereotypes. This is the real problem. Both the black community and the non black communities all seem to embrace their stereotypes in order to define their race. More importantly, they embrace the ultimate white stereotype: all whites are “extremely self-involved, uneducated about people other than themselves, are unable to understand the complicated ways in which people who are not white survive, and are in deep denial about racism.” How is a white person in denial about racism when a white person can get called a racist for almost anything? White people tiptoe around everything because they are afraid of being labeled. The specific term is “white guilt.” They have been made to feel guilty for the actions of their ancestors, something they have no control over. Non-white people, however, embrace their labels whenever it is convenient. People who have never been near the ghetto adopt the lingo because it emphasizes their blackness. Why should coming from a poor community with high crime be something to be proud of when you did nothing to help the people still there? Kids who speak perfect English tell me “no hable Ingles” because they don’t feel like speaking to me. I know they speak English because I speak Spanish (I live in FL). I am well aware that most people aren’t like this, but it’s been my experience that good people are willing to give in to bad habits. It’s one of the reasons racism still exists. We’ve all gotten so used to it, accepted it, defined ourselves with it, that we can’t move past it. Not black, white, or in between. The black community is falling apart for the same reason all of our communities are losing cohesion. We’ve defined ourselves based on race, not on ethnicity. They’re different. Ethnicity is based on people who identify with each other based on common heritage, ancestors, language and sometimes race. We should focus less on identifying by color, and identify based on heritage and values. This will build a stronger community. It’s also why the black community has rejected some “black” members. They don’t have the same values that the community wants to project. But they do have the heritage, and it would be better to include them and use them as examples of what not to do, learn from their mistakes. Just don’t say they’re acting “white,” “Asian,” whatever, or it’s because he’s not black enough. Say it’s because he’s a crappy human being and doesn’t represent the positive values of the black community. These bad examples wouldn’t be better people if they were fully black, because that part doesn’t matter. It’s the connection to the community that does. Focus on heritage, not race, values, not stereotype. You’ll find that with the destruction of negative stereotypes, new positive ones will emerge, and no culture will be lost in the meantime, rather, it’ll be restored.

    Comment by Tasha | Sunday, March 27, 2011 | Reply

    • Thanks for the feedback Tasha,

      But your response is rather comical. You want to say everybody here is talking about racial stereotypes and giving opinions based on their stereotypes. And then you launch into your own racial stereotype of how white people suffer from white guilt. Just look at some of your statements. “They have been made to feel guilty for the actions of their ancestors, something they have no control over.” Now who exactly is caught up in stereotypes? You come here defending white people as if no one is doing anything racist now. But the fact that we live in a racial status quo that was built by white people’s ancestors and we maintain today. So let’s say somebody commits a crime. But then the descendants of that person continue to perpetuate the crime, does that mean that the descendants are not guilty? White people are not helpless victims in the war against racism. They can take measures to undo the damage that has been done to the black community. But all too often the choice is made to perpetuate racial disparity. If white people feel guilty maybe its because they are accomplices.

      Peace

      Comment by brotherpeacemaker | Sunday, March 27, 2011 | Reply

  22. Almost 3 years since your posting brother peacemaker and I couldn’t agree more!!

    Comment by WellSaid | Sunday, February 12, 2012 | Reply

  23. As a white woman who fell in love with and married a black man, I saw the racial hatred directed at me. The statement that white’s are generic is ignorant on it’s face. We (white people) come from various tribes as well. Black does not make a Black all the same origin………nor does White make a White of all the same heritage. I offered my husband my love. He and his family bestowed upon me the greatest of hate. I lived through a life threatening situation, and this was in higher levels of society. Level of society does not change a person’s hate. Access to the White Girl is not necessarily denigrating of oneself, as a Black Man , but even possibly a way to bring a White individual down, by denying the White Man a White Woman. Like I heard my stepchildren and my husband say so many times……”One drop of blood”. Who was rascist? I found out what Whites need to learn. Most Black people hate us.
    I am lucky to be alive.

    Comment by Joanie | Sunday, August 12, 2012 | Reply

    • Thanks for the feedback Joanie,

      But your attempts to educate are pretty pathetic. We all have a ancestry that if we were able to trace back far enough, would identify a particular tribe or group or whatever. The term “generic white” is not a reference to white people’s heritage, but to white people’s current social condition. Generally speaking white people are considered the norm. White people set the standard for what is and for what isn’t acceptable in our culture. Black on black crime is always a reference to black people’s deviant behavior, but never once have I heard the media refer to the even more widespread problem of white on white crime.

      You say you offered your husband your love. Well good for you. His family offered you hate. Did you ever ask why? Did you try to understand the hurt and pain of their black existence? Access to white people is not necessarily a denigration of the black community? Are you serious? If a black person person decides to marry someone other than black will the children of the union consider themselves members of the black community? Not likely. It takes a lot to convince a child of a mixed union that they are still part of the black community. Generically speaking children of mixed unions will deny an affiliation with the black community and try to minimize their own blackness. They will try to identify their “new tribe” as if being mixed is a race unto itself.

      The black community is in trouble and needs help. Instead of getting that help, a lot of people abandon the black community. The black community suffers from higher unemployment, fewer opportunities for quality education, harsher punishment in our judicial system, harsher standards of behavior from law enforcement. We can’t even allow our children to walk down the street without some yahoo in a truck ready to jump out shooting and claiming self defense. And you worry about people judging you and your relationship. You really need to stop with all the self pity, open your eyes, and understand what’s going on. If you loved your black man like you claim you would see what’s really happening.

      Peace

      Comment by brotherpeacemaker | Monday, August 13, 2012 | Reply

  24. IM DATING A BLACKMAN A SETSWANA MAN HIS FAMILY DONT HATE ME, BECAUSE IM WHITE YAH THE STORY GOES ON BY SAYING WHITE WOMEN DATE BLACK MEN FOR MONEY BUT FOR ME ITS ABOUT WHAT YOU SEE AND FEEL TOGETHER MONEY DONT BUY LOVE . WE ARE MOT THE SAME COLOUR YES BUT WE ARE FROM THE SAME FATHER IN HEAVEN WHOM MADE US ALL GOD DID NOT SAY ONE COLOUR SHOULD STAY WITH HIS OWN ITS OUR PEOPLE THAT HAS DONE IT LIKE APARTHEID
    ITS NOT ABOUT MIXING RACE OR WHAT SO EVER ITS ABOUT FINDING THAT PATH WITH SOMEONE THAT YOU FEEL COMFORTABLE WITH
    IVE DATED MANY WHITE MEN, INDIAN MEN BUT FOR ME I DID NOT FIND THAT CLOSENESS THAT SUPPORT OF LOVE LIKE I DO WITH MY MAN NOW.
    MANY PEOPLE ASKED US IS IT REAL LOVE OR IS IT JUST A SIMPLE AFFAIR WE HAVE WELL IT IS REAL LOVE
    BETWEEN BLACK MEN AND WHITE WOMEN CULTURES ARE DIFFERENT YES SO WHAT…………………
    I PERSONALLY SAY IF YOU LOVE THAT PERSON YO U WONT CARE WHAT OTHERS MIGHT THINK OR SAY ABOUT YOU.

    Comment by ANGELFACE | Sunday, March 17, 2013 | Reply


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